“Just do me a favor, make sure my tombstone says ‘She tried!’ cause I literally give up!”
I actually said those exact words to Lance last week. I was being so dramatic and emotional- and probably just needed a good night's sleep. But the poor guy looked scared to leave for the office. I mean, I definitely seemed unstable.
I had spent 5 hours (over the course of 3 days) on the phone trying to get Boeden’s prescription refilled. Our insurance company is the bane of my existence (yes, CIGNA, I am talking to you!) They have told me 3 times that they have overnighted the medication to us, and everytime, they have had to cancel the order because the medication is out of stock, but they have not called/emailed/ notified us. So I just sit there day after day waiting for a delivery that never arrives. As I type this, we still don’t have his medication. I am trying to switch the order back to The Medicine Chest- which is so much more reliable!!
And, Boss and the lick granuloma might be the death of me. So much effort!! The second I take his cone off, our cute little Houdini figures out how to rip open the scab….which sets us back to square 1. But his puppy dog eyes in that cone really tugs at my heartstrings, so I take it off to let him run around and the wound reopens. Let’s just say getting a wound to heal on a dog’s hind paw is an uphill battle, but I am not giving up!
And, I might have also said I was quitting the bakery. It was a moment of frustration, and not sincere. I was working on the caramel brownies- and the caramel component is very temperamental. I botched an entire batch of caramel- which lets just say required me to go to 2 stores to get more ingredients. So that is never good. (Hence why getting the messages from so many of you that you loved them so much really meant the world to me!)
And, I was exhausted from trying to wean Boeden from his nightly melatonin. He started taking melatonin when he was 3, prior to his sleep apnea surgery, and the doctors all said to keep him on it, so we did. But I recently started to worry that at age 10 he was “addicted” which I know is sorta extreme and his specialists all say it’s not addictive. But I felt like he was waking up in a bad mood more often than not so l decided to switch him to a nightly magnesium cocktail (and told him it was just a different form of melatonin.) The magnesium takes a lot longer to work, and he comes out of his room at least 5 times before one of us eventually goes to lay with him. So I am just exchanging one bad habit for another bad habit- but hopefully he will adjust sooner rather than later!
And my sweet high school boy. He is just a boy- and I am used to my girls, and their study habits. Plus, Bensten hates to disappoint anyone - so even constructive criticism can really upset him. This week he was planning to finish a History paper on the bus ride to school (insert mind exploding emoji!!) Let’s just say it was a rough morning at our house, but I do think we had some helpful conversations and hopefully he knows that we just want to help him be successful. As do his teachers. (Have I mentioned how much I love Flint Hill? Seriously an amazing school!)
And, I think the real kicker was when I went down to our exercise room to run on the treadmill, and caught a glimpse of my tree-trunk legs in the mirror. This middle age weight gain is no joke. I am doing everything they say to do- eat well, intermittent fasting, high protein foods, exercise blah blah blah and I swear I am expanding at the speed of light. Thankfully I have an appointment at the Menopause Center in April (I scheduled it 5 months ago, so anyone who thinks their hormones might be wacky- get on a doctor’s schedule asap. This wait has felt like an eternity!) Anyway, I was so discouraged by what I saw in the mirror, that I cranked up the treadmill way too high and tried to pound out my frustrations. After 2.5 miles, my hip gave out and I have been hobbling like a true old lady ever since. This Cherry Blossom 10-Miler training is getting dicey but I am TRYING!!!
All this to say, I amI headed to Miami. Izzy, Liliana and I will spend a week on the beach and hopefully I can recharge. I wasn’t going to join them- but Lance convinced me that he could handle everything at home- so I am on my way! (Huge shout out to Lance who never shies away from the heavy lifting and will definitely not tell me if this week is any imposition for him! I am very grateful!) and I am mostly excited- a little anxious- but grateful for this time with my girls! Relaxing is definitely not my forte, but I am trying!
Below is our St Patty’s Menu. Baking 3/15!
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